Strength in every form: my mum, dementia, and the inspiration behind Mettle & Grace

September marks World Alzheimer’s Month - a time to raise awareness of dementia in all its forms, and to honour the people and families whose lives it reshapes. For many, dementia is something you hear about from afar. For me, it is deeply personal.

A life of care

My mum has always been small, but fierce. Her strength was forged early. As a church foundling - an orphan who never knew her family background - she could easily have been left untethered. Instead, that absence gave her a quiet determination to build a life full of care and connection.

She devoted her working life to caring for people living with dementia, offering patience, compassion, and resilience that was second to none. Alongside raising our family, she also cared for her own father, my grandfather, who lived with us when I was growing up. She carried that weight with the same grit and grace that defined everything she did.

When everything changed

Five years ago, everything changed. Following two strokes, my mum was diagnosed with vascular dementia. Over time, she began to lose her ability to communicate - one of the most painful aspects of the illness, and a quiet unravelling of how she once made sense of the world.

As a family, we made the difficult decision to move Mum into a care home where she could receive round-the-clock support and, most importantly, feel safe. It was not an easy step, but it was the one that gave her the care she so richly deserved after all the years she had given selflessly to others.

Strength in new forms

Yet even now, her strength shines through. Her care for others is still evident in her presence, her gestures, and her spirit. She remains a daily reminder to me that true strength takes many forms.

Mettle & Grace was born, in part, from her example. Growing up in the north, I understood strength early - not the loud, visible kind, but the steady, enduring strength of women who held families together, who cared, who endured. Watching my mum’s life shaped by dementia, and remembering all the years she gave of herself to others, showed me that women need spaces to build their strength physically, emotionally, and mentally.

Strength beyond the physical

World Alzheimer’s Month is about more than awareness. It is a reminder that strength is not just about muscles or fitness. It lives in the body, yes, but also in the mind, and in the quiet resilience of love and care. It is in the mothers, daughters, sisters, and friends who give, adapt, and continue to stand strong in the face of change.

If you would like to learn more about dementia, or find support for yourself or a loved one, the Alzheimer’s Society offers a wealth of guidance and resources: www.alzheimers.org.uk.

With strength & grace,

Vix x